Author Topic: Our parent's 'wisdom'!  (Read 1365 times)

floo

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Our parent's 'wisdom'!
« on: March 20, 2016, 12:04:28 PM »
I found this on another forum and most of it struck a cord with me, how about you?


1.My mother taught me TO APPRECIATE A JOB WELL DONE.

 "If you're going to kill each other, do it outside. I just finished
 cleaning."

 2.My mother taught me RELIGION.

 "You better pray that will come out of the carpet."

 3.My father taught me about TIME TRAVEL.

 "If you don't straighten up, I'm going to knock you into the middle of next
 week!"

 4.My father taught me LOGIC.

 " Because I said so, that's why ."

 5.My mother taught me MORE LOGIC .

 "If you fall out of that swing and break your neck, you're not going to the
 store with me."

 6.My mother taught me FORESIGHT.

 "Make sure you wear clean underwear, in case you're in an accident."

 7.My father taught me IRONY.

 "Keep crying, and I'll give you something to cry about."

 8.My mother taught me about the science of OSMOSIS.

 "Shut your mouth and eat your supper."

 9.My mother taught me about CONTORTIONISM.

 "Just you look at that dirt on the back of your neck!"

 10.My mother taught me about STAMINA.

 "You'll sit there until all that spinach is gone."

 11.My mother taught me about WEATHER.

 "This room of yours looks as if a tornado went through it."

 12.My mother taught me about HYPOCRISY.

 "If I told you once, I've told you a million times, don't exaggerate!"

 13.My father taught me the CIRCLE OF LIFE.

 "I brought you into this world, and I can take you out..."

 14.My mother taught me about BEHAVIOR MODIFICATION .

 "Stop acting like your father!"

 15.My mother taught me about ENVY.

 "There are millions of less fortunate children in this world who don't have
 wonderful parents like you do."

 16.My mother taught me about ANTICIPATION.

 "Just wait until we get home."

 17.My mother taught me about RECEIVING.

 "You are going to get it from your father when you get home!"

 18 .My mother taught me MEDICAL SCIENCE.

 "If you don't stop crossing your eyes, they are going to get stuck that
 way."

 19.My mother taught me ESP.

 "Put your sweater on; don't you think I know when you are cold?"

 20.My father taught me HUMOR.

 "When that lawn mower cuts off your toes, don't come running to me."

 21.My mother taught me HOW TO BECOME AN ADULT.

 "If you don't eat your vegetables, you'll never grow up."

 22.My mother taught me GENETICS.

 "You're just like your father."

 23.My mother taught me about my ROOTS.

 "Shut that door behind you. Do you think you were born in a barn?"

 24.My mother taught me WISDOM.

 "When you get to be my age, you'll understand.

 25.My father taught me about JUSTICE .

 "One day you'll have kids, and I hope they turn out just like you!"



I will add my mother's concern.

"If you kill yourself what will people think?"




SqueakyVoice

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Re: Our parent's 'wisdom'!
« Reply #1 on: March 20, 2016, 01:09:56 PM »
My parents told me that every third child born in the world was chinese. And that's why they stopped at two.

A bit racist.
"Let us think the unthinkable, let us do the undoable, let us prepare to grapple with the ineffable itself, and see if we may not eff it after all" - D Adams

ekim

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Re: Our parent's 'wisdom'!
« Reply #2 on: March 20, 2016, 03:14:53 PM »
or ...... on this planet, every second, there is a woman giving birth to a baby .  This woman must be found and stopped.

Brownie

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Re: Our parent's 'wisdom'!
« Reply #3 on: March 20, 2016, 09:42:49 PM »
That's very funny floo and some of the sayings certainly strike a chord with me.
Let us profit by what every day and hour teaches us

floo

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Re: Our parent's 'wisdom'!
« Reply #4 on: March 21, 2016, 08:08:26 AM »
My father's favourite expression when he was cross with my sisters and myself as kids was, "I would sooner see you up in the churchyard than turn out bad!" And he meant it.

Nearly Sane

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Re: Our parent's 'wisdom'!
« Reply #5 on: March 21, 2016, 08:14:26 AM »
My father's favourite expression when he was cross with my sisters and myself as kids was, "I would sooner see you up in the churchyard than turn out bad!" And he meant it.
Bit like this?

https://m.youtube.com/?#/watch?v=o2nv5Mn9OVA