AB,
I could write a book on this subject. There are so many things I could say about my relationship with God.
Perhaps you could start with whether or not you do have a “relationship with God” rather than just a
belief that you have one?
Up until my mid twenties, I thought I knew all about God. I went to church, attended the sacraments, said my prayers. I may have known about God, but God brought me into a situation in which I came to know Him, not just know about Him.
Again, I have no doubt that you
believe that to be the case. The question though concerned how you ascertain that you’re not mistaken about that.
My experience was triggered by a priest inviting me to "Life in the Spirit" seminars which he said would change your life. But I did not want my life to be changed - I was quite happy with a good circle of friends, a good job, my own house and a brand new silver TR7 with a soft top and what I felt to be strong faith. But I felt curious and was drawn to these seminars (despite misgivings about leaving my TR7 in a rough council estate during dark November evenings). It really was a life changing experience. I invited the Holy Spirit into my life and discovered a God who loved me. Reading scriptures became a new experience as deeper and deeper meanings were revealed. Music became a powerful prayer, and when I volunteered to play guitar I was teamed up with my future wife! Since then I have had a wonderful prayer partner in my lovely wife with whom I could share this new dimension to my faith.
You know I assume that there have been and continue to be countless people who have believed just as fervently as you and who have had just as profound life-changing experiences as yours but who think the causal agencies were gods you think to be false. Unless all gods are real, it’s demonstrably the case therefore that there’s no need at all for gods to be real for their believers to have experiences of the type you describe.
Now of itself that doesn’t necessarily mean that you’re mistaken, but it does mean that your reply goes not one step toward answering the question about how you know that you’re
not mistaken in your belief. No-one is suggesting that you’re trying to deceive anyone – it’s entirely possible that you’re honestly mistaken (and your inability to argue cogently for this “God” suggests that you may well be).
Can I suggest that you do some research into cognitive dissonance? Essentially it’s the holding of beliefs that cannot be shaken by the evidence that contradicts them. Typically the subject will either deny the evidence, or will change it so it appears to support his beliefs. The effect though is that a challenge – however well-founded – will often actually strengthen the belief rather than shake it, especially when the belief is central to someone’s identity. You seem to me to be an example of the phenomenon – evidence from the world of neuroscience is shown to you countless times, yet you persist with your “little man at the controls” claim supported by an apparently endless roster of logically false arguments.
Does this not concern you at all?