For a detailed answer I would refer you to :
"God in the Dock" by CS Lewis
Well what about a straight answer to a straight question.
Whilst you make bald assertions daily on here your refusal to answer such straight questions, this is just one example, shows us all we need to know about how keen you are to look at your own position in the bald light of day.
Almost with every post you make your claim to be here to help others come to know an all powerful God, with whom your are certain you are in a direct relationship with and whom would know exactly what would convince me of his existence, travels even further beyond laughable.
So if God does exist and wants to be in a relationship with me, your post are having making that even less likely to happen. As I understand it some Christians think it is the Devil that is trying to drive people away from God. Are you certain that you are not in a relationship with Satan? Isn't this exactly what you would expect, a non-believer moving (if indeed moving in any direction at all) further away from God?