Really
Of course I can't control my sexual orientation, but at any moment in time, I have the option of choosing what I want to do....
and if you are choosing from a range of options, the one you end up choosing
is your preference, at that moment in time, by defacto definition. We cannot
choose what our preference should be, because that implies an infinite regress of choice wherein we choose what to prefer based on some prior judgment of what to prefer, which judgement itself must therefore be based on some prior judgment of what to prefer which judgement itself must therefore be based on some prior judgment of what to prefer ... ad infinitum
It doesn't work like that, it couldn't work like that, and if human choice operated on such a basis then free will would be a curse leading to our early extinction. When we think through which option to choose we are engaging in a deterministic algorithm to yield a result and the buck stops with whatever our preference is, and our preferences in the present moment are something have have no 'control' over as they are formed in the past; they are an outcome of prior experience and we cannot change the past.