Vlad,
Yes Blue but the point is I have come to know it.
This is like opening a window to let out a bluebottle, only to watch it continually bang its head against the closed window next to it. No, you don't "know" that at all - you think it likely, you can grasp no argument to the contrary, you really want it to be true perhaps but it's still just a
belief, and a personal one too. If you really think there to be a logical path from your subjective belief to an objective certainty by all means try to set it out, but for now you have only assertion - as does the muslim about Allah, the Aztec about the panther gods, and for all we know the unicornist about unicorns.
As CS Lewis would put it, I was ''surprised by it''.
Why? If you're able to set the evidential bar low enough, you cleave inextricably to narratives that make sense to you however daft, you're entirely untroubled by the co-incidence of the "real" god just happening to be the one with which you're most familiar, you refuse to extend to the beliefs of others just on their say-so the same courtesy you expect others to offer your belief just on your say-so etc then I'd have thought you'd inevitably end up as you have.
That just leaves you to pray that a) it happens to you or b) pray that it doesn't.
No, it still leaves
you finally to explain why your confidence in your faith should be taken any more seriously than anyone else's confidence in his faith in anything else.
I believe that one day all of us either have to acquiesce to the source of the experience or be prepared to throw totally oneself in resistance to it. I think the story of Pincher Martin is perhaps the finest exposition of what that struggle may be like.
Well, not sure you can "acquiesce" to something you've yet to establish exists - especially as you seem to have no interest in making an argument for it, in eliminating first the myriad naturalistic causal alternatives, in suggesting why you're right and believers in other supernaturalisms are wrong etc so you seem again to be overreaching here.