Oh Dear

[Leonard James]

As a parent of disabled children I can tell you that there's a huge swathe of guilt at the conflicting feelings you get each and every time you realise you've just your child for something that wasn't their fault.

O.

Neither is it the parents fault! I feel terribly sad for you, O, and people in similar situations, and I can quite understand how you feel sometimes.

However, the blame lies entirely with nature and the way it works, and not with the parents, who are just as much innocent victims as the children.

If for one moment I believed that life and the universe were created by some great intelligence, then it would earn my eternal contempt and revulsion. Fortunately I don't, of course.

[Leonard James]

Brilliant and instructive post, Outrider. Congratulations.

This is a wonderfully instructive response to most bigotted attempts to put down same sex and single parent families.

I heartily agree! I hope the dissenters will shut up once and for all, and admit they were wrong, but I suspect the hope is forlorn. 

[Owlswing]

Brilliant and instructive post, Outrider. Congratulations.

This is a wonderfully instructive response to most bigotted attempts to put down same sex and single parent families.

I heartily agree! I hope the dissenters will shut up once and for all, and admit they were wrong, but I suspect the hope is forlorn. 

You suspect?

A good few years on the Beeb and a few on here and I am certain of it!

[Outrider]

Brilliant and instructive post, Outrider. Congratulations.

This is a wonderfully instructive response to most bigotted attempts to put down same sex and single parent families.

I heartily agree! I hope the dissenters will shut up once and for all, and admit they were wrong, but I suspect the hope is forlorn. 

You suspect?

A good few years on the Beeb and a few on here and I am certain of it!

Let's give them the chance to respond, shall we? Certainly, in the past, a valid bone of contention had been that there wasn't sufficient long-term information, or from a broad-enough sample-set, to make definitive judgments - although there was no evidence to suggest there was any negative effect on the children of same-sex parents directly because of their same-sex situation, there wasn't enough confidence or depth in the findings to justify claiming it was risk-free.

Now, though, the research has moved on, with more studies, over longer periods - I suspect that's one of the reasons why Hope specifically asked for a longitudinal study, and why I was particularly pleased to find one that even went so far as to call itself such.

O.

[jeremyp]

Let's give them the chance to respond, shall we? Certainly, in the past, a valid bone of contention had been that there wasn't sufficient long-term information, or from a broad-enough sample-set, to make definitive judgments

I'm a little bit concerned about the idea of making judgements at all based on these studies. 

If it were valid to say "gay couples can't have children because their children are at a disadvantage (on average) compared to those of heterosexual couples" then it is also valid to say "poor couples  can't have children because their children are at a disadvantage (on average) compared to those of richer couples" or "stupid couples can't have children because their children are at a disadvantage (on average) compared to those of more intelligent couples".

These are cans of worms I don't want to open.

[Outrider]

Let's give them the chance to respond, shall we? Certainly, in the past, a valid bone of contention had been that there wasn't sufficient long-term information, or from a broad-enough sample-set, to make definitive judgments

I'm a little bit concerned about the idea of making judgements at all based on these studies. 

If it were valid to say "gay couples can't have children because their children are at a disadvantage (on average) compared to those of heterosexual couples" then it is also valid to say "poor couples  can't have children because their children are at a disadvantage (on average) compared to those of richer couples" or "stupid couples can't have children because their children are at a disadvantage (on average) compared to those of more intelligent couples".

These are cans of worms I don't want to open.

People will make judgments regardless, that's human nature. Whether we should validate those judgments by implementing legislation is one thing, but whether those judgments are justified or not is another.

O.

[ippy]

There are over 4,000,000 mixed race people in Ohio. Chances that the child will be bullied for being mixed race are pretty much nill. They LOST their case. They were not concerned about the child being bullied for same sex parents enough not to go sperm shopping. It isn't about the children's, it's all about what those two wanted. They are not being honest. Again, they lost.

Yes it is about what they wanted, but is it wrong to do that? The same sex bit is a bit of a red herring in that this could apply to any heterosexual couple where the man is infertile.

For example if you are a black couple or a white couple do you really expect to have a half Chinese baby and for one partner to be accused of knocking off the bloke from the local Chinese takeaway?

If people are married to some who is Chinese, then it's perfectly ok.

Or if someone is adopted, again that's fine.

It's about what couples are expecting and it would be a bit of a shock to someone of any colour to have to cope with the unexpected if it is likely to cause gossip.

Not everyone wants to have to explain they were impregnated.

Some just want to be a family.

How about changing your forum handle from Rose to Dynasaur? Or "Dustbin" these posts of yours on this thread are nonsensicle rubbish so Dustbin might be for the best.

You need to catch up with the times, you're referring to how things were quite a few years back more than thirty years to my knowledge; the view you're expressing was right on deaths door when we adopted our first mixed race son he's now thirtysix.

By the way having a  coloured thread reappear in a family suddenly after several generations is an old wives tale but the darker skin can be dominant for a couple of generations; we had to go through fourty differing lectures before having our first of two boys and believe me they addoption services didn't leave much out thus the confidance telling you about that particular aspect of skin colour, we had it first hand from the experts.

By the way we are all one race the human race, why it would bother anyone to see an oriental with any other white or black child, or any other mixture you can think of, frankly Rose I do not understand what it is you're saying or why on earth you're thinking this way, thus my suggestion with your forum name.

You need to get over whatever it is or was that made you think in the way you've expressed yourself on this thread.

ippy