Author Topic: Forklift driver survives eight-hour ordeal by cheese  (Read 4502 times)

SqueakyVoice

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Forklift driver survives eight-hour ordeal by cheese
« on: May 07, 2016, 07:08:39 PM »
http://gu.com/p/4jvne

He should have driven more Caerphilly.

Apparently as cheese collasped around him he shouted "YARG!"



Sigh, I'm wasted on you lot.
"Let us think the unthinkable, let us do the undoable, let us prepare to grapple with the ineffable itself, and see if we may not eff it after all" - D Adams

Shaker

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Re: Forklift driver survives eight-hour ordeal by cheese
« Reply #1 on: May 07, 2016, 07:10:36 PM »
Not me - I used to be a fork lift driver more years ago than I want to think about  ::)
Pain, or damage, don't end the world. Or despair, or fucking beatings. The world ends when you're dead. Until then, you got more punishment in store. Stand it like a man, and give some back. - Al Swearengen, Deadwood.

Jack Knave

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Re: Forklift driver survives eight-hour ordeal by cheese
« Reply #2 on: May 07, 2016, 07:38:53 PM »
That's whey over the top Squeaky!!!

Walt Zingmatilder

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Re: Forklift driver survives eight-hour ordeal by cheese
« Reply #3 on: May 07, 2016, 08:12:59 PM »
Not me - I used to be a fork lift driver more years ago than I want to think about  ::)
I worked in a warehouse once and a fork lift driver ran over someone]s foot and ran over it again as he was reversing to see what all the fuss was about.

SqueakyVoice

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Re: Forklift driver survives eight-hour ordeal by cheese
« Reply #4 on: May 07, 2016, 08:23:44 PM »
When a spokesperson was asked if they'd finished clearing up the cheese, he replied,

"No, there's Stiltons."
"Let us think the unthinkable, let us do the undoable, let us prepare to grapple with the ineffable itself, and see if we may not eff it after all" - D Adams

Rhiannon

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Re: Forklift driver survives eight-hour ordeal by cheese
« Reply #5 on: May 07, 2016, 08:25:35 PM »
He deserves a grilling, but it will start to grate after a while.

Rhiannon

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Re: Forklift driver survives eight-hour ordeal by cheese
« Reply #6 on: May 07, 2016, 08:33:35 PM »
Best not to fetashise these cheese jokes though. That wouldn't be very mature.

Gordon

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Re: Forklift driver survives eight-hour ordeal by cheese
« Reply #7 on: May 07, 2016, 08:35:44 PM »
He clearly wasn't sufficiently Caerphilly.

Walt Zingmatilder

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Re: Forklift driver survives eight-hour ordeal by cheese
« Reply #8 on: May 07, 2016, 08:38:56 PM »
Edam well make sure it doesn't happen again.

Walt Zingmatilder

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Re: Forklift driver survives eight-hour ordeal by cheese
« Reply #9 on: May 07, 2016, 08:41:18 PM »
In Birmingham this sort of thing is considered a gruyere-ea

Walt Zingmatilder

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Re: Forklift driver survives eight-hour ordeal by cheese
« Reply #10 on: May 07, 2016, 08:43:04 PM »
In Birmingham this sort of thing is considered a gruyere-ea
Sorry I said Birmingham...it should, of course. have Red Leicester.

Walt Zingmatilder

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Re: Forklift driver survives eight-hour ordeal by cheese
« Reply #11 on: May 07, 2016, 08:45:34 PM »
http://gu.com/p/4jvne

He should have driven more Caerphilly.

Yes he could have driven with more Kraft.

Rhiannon

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Re: Forklift driver survives eight-hour ordeal by cheese
« Reply #12 on: May 07, 2016, 09:11:11 PM »
This is driving me crackers. I'm in such a pickle.

SqueakyVoice

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Re: Forklift driver survives eight-hour ordeal by cheese
« Reply #13 on: May 07, 2016, 09:20:08 PM »
All joking aside, the poor bloke's been through a traumatic experience. 

You've gouda feel sorry for him.
"Let us think the unthinkable, let us do the undoable, let us prepare to grapple with the ineffable itself, and see if we may not eff it after all" - D Adams

Gordon

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Re: Forklift driver survives eight-hour ordeal by cheese
« Reply #14 on: May 07, 2016, 09:28:24 PM »
I'd imagine he got a telling-off from the boss: lock, stock and two smokin' babybells.


Brownie

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Re: Forklift driver survives eight-hour ordeal by cheese
« Reply #15 on: May 08, 2016, 05:26:19 AM »
Definitely out of orda, Health & Safety needs tightening across the board.
Let us profit by what every day and hour teaches us

Bubbles

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Re: Forklift driver survives eight-hour ordeal by cheese
« Reply #16 on: May 08, 2016, 07:24:50 AM »
Omg! You lot can be so cheesy sometimes  ;)

floo

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Re: Forklift driver survives eight-hour ordeal by cheese
« Reply #17 on: May 08, 2016, 08:05:22 AM »
http://gu.com/p/4jvne

He should have driven more Caerphilly.

Apparently as cheese collasped around him he shouted "YARG!"



Sigh, I'm wasted on you lot.

Hardly the stuff of jokes, poor man!

L.A.

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Re: Forklift driver survives eight-hour ordeal by cheese
« Reply #18 on: May 08, 2016, 09:20:56 AM »
He must have been driving like  Halloumi!
Brexit Bar:

Full of nuts but with lots of flakey bits and a bitter aftertaste

Gonnagle

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Re: Forklift driver survives eight-hour ordeal by cheese
« Reply #19 on: May 08, 2016, 09:36:59 AM »
Dear Squeaky,

You and old Septic Toe are kings on this forum for the corny gag, God Bless you both ;) you could say you are the Big Cheese's on this forum, no you could, no honestly you could, no no really 8)

Which is the most religious cheese?  Swiss, because it is holey.

Gonnagle.

http://www.barnardos.org.uk/shop/shop-search.htm

http://www.twam.uk/donate-tools

Go on make a difference, have a rummage in your attic or garage.

L.A.

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Re: Forklift driver survives eight-hour ordeal by cheese
« Reply #20 on: May 08, 2016, 09:40:19 AM »
Quote
Which is the most religious cheese?  Swiss, because it is holey.

Surely it must be those Dutch ones with the baby Cheeses!
Brexit Bar:

Full of nuts but with lots of flakey bits and a bitter aftertaste

ippy

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Re: Forklift driver survives eight-hour ordeal by cheese
« Reply #21 on: May 08, 2016, 10:25:46 AM »
Perhaps he should have used a cheese fork               lift?

ippy

Shaker

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Re: Forklift driver survives eight-hour ordeal by cheese
« Reply #22 on: May 08, 2016, 10:33:43 AM »
Can't say I'm fondue all these puns.
Pain, or damage, don't end the world. Or despair, or fucking beatings. The world ends when you're dead. Until then, you got more punishment in store. Stand it like a man, and give some back. - Al Swearengen, Deadwood.

L.A.

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Re: Forklift driver survives eight-hour ordeal by cheese
« Reply #23 on: May 08, 2016, 11:10:07 AM »
Can't say I'm fondue all these puns.

You should un-Feta you imagination.
Brexit Bar:

Full of nuts but with lots of flakey bits and a bitter aftertaste

Brownie

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Re: Forklift driver survives eight-hour ordeal by cheese
« Reply #24 on: May 08, 2016, 11:12:59 AM »
He asked his boss about compensation the reply was, ''Hard cheese''.
Let us profit by what every day and hour teaches us