Author Topic: More jokes please, good or bad as long as they're funny.  (Read 159571 times)

jeremyp

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Re: More jokes please, good or bad as long as they're funny.
« Reply #1775 on: January 26, 2024, 10:26:21 AM »
I'm playing Midge Ure at Scrabble

You can't use proper nouns.
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Nearly Sane

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Re: More jokes please, good or bad as long as they're funny.
« Reply #1776 on: January 27, 2024, 03:22:10 AM »
“Went to showbiz party. Met Jim Davidson, a fine comedian and a gentleman. Talked to all three of them.”


Benny Hill

SteveH

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Re: More jokes please, good or bad as long as they're funny.
« Reply #1777 on: January 27, 2024, 11:41:00 AM »
I'm playing Midge Ure at Scrabble
I've four letters left, but,
They mean nothing to me,
OVNR
"That bloke over there, out of Ultravox, is really childish."
"Him? Midge Ure?"
"Yes, very."
I have a pet termite. His name is Clint. Clint eats wood.

Walt Zingmatilder

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Re: More jokes please, good or bad as long as they're funny.
« Reply #1778 on: January 28, 2024, 01:45:04 PM »
"That bloke over there, out of Ultravox, is really childish."
"Him? Midge Ure?"
"Yes, very."
I'm stealing that.

Nearly Sane

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Re: More jokes please, good or bad as long as they're funny.
« Reply #1779 on: January 28, 2024, 09:28:39 PM »
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SteveH

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Re: More jokes please, good or bad as long as they're funny.
« Reply #1780 on: January 29, 2024, 05:43:36 PM »
There's a new opera based on the life of George Formby. It's called 'Turandot Nice Again'.
I have a pet termite. His name is Clint. Clint eats wood.

Nearly Sane

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Re: More jokes please, good or bad as long as they're funny.
« Reply #1781 on: January 29, 2024, 11:00:05 PM »
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Nearly Sane

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Re: More jokes please, good or bad as long as they're funny.
« Reply #1782 on: January 30, 2024, 01:07:27 AM »
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Nearly Sane

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Re: More jokes please, good or bad as long as they're funny.
« Reply #1783 on: January 30, 2024, 02:32:58 PM »
.

Nearly Sane

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Re: More jokes please, good or bad as long as they're funny.
« Reply #1784 on: January 30, 2024, 09:41:50 PM »
Spike Milligan

Aruntraveller

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Re: More jokes please, good or bad as long as they're funny.
« Reply #1785 on: January 31, 2024, 09:43:52 PM »
..
Before we work on Artificial Intelligence shouldn't we address the problem of natural stupidity.

Sebastian Toe

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Re: More jokes please, good or bad as long as they're funny.
« Reply #1786 on: February 03, 2024, 12:20:43 PM »
Jürgen Klopp has been talking about looking forward to leaving Liverpool FC when he can spend more quality time at home with family, his wife Klipp and their daughter Klippity.
"The word God is for me nothing more than the expression and product of human weaknesses, the Bible a collection of honourable, but still primitive legends.'
Albert Einstein

Aruntraveller

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Re: More jokes please, good or bad as long as they're funny.
« Reply #1787 on: February 03, 2024, 01:39:36 PM »
..
Before we work on Artificial Intelligence shouldn't we address the problem of natural stupidity.

Nearly Sane

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Re: More jokes please, good or bad as long as they're funny.
« Reply #1788 on: February 03, 2024, 01:48:27 PM »
Beethoven is everywhere

Nearly Sane

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Re: More jokes please, good or bad as long as they're funny.
« Reply #1789 on: February 08, 2024, 11:59:42 AM »
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jeremyp

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Re: More jokes please, good or bad as long as they're funny.
« Reply #1790 on: February 08, 2024, 04:09:06 PM »
My wife caught me kicking dropped ice cubes under the kitchen appliances instead of picking them up, but she's forgiven me. It's water under the fridge.
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Nearly Sane

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Re: More jokes please, good or bad as long as they're funny.
« Reply #1791 on: February 09, 2024, 08:12:28 AM »
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SteveH

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Re: More jokes please, good or bad as long as they're funny.
« Reply #1792 on: February 09, 2024, 12:41:27 PM »
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Because rap "music" grates on the ear.
I have a pet termite. His name is Clint. Clint eats wood.

Aruntraveller

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Re: More jokes please, good or bad as long as they're funny.
« Reply #1793 on: February 09, 2024, 01:37:01 PM »
not to mention shredding your nerves.
Before we work on Artificial Intelligence shouldn't we address the problem of natural stupidity.

SteveH

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Re: More jokes please, good or bad as long as they're funny.
« Reply #1794 on: February 09, 2024, 07:03:31 PM »
Shakespeare walks into a pub. The landlord says "Oy, you - you're bard!"
I have a pet termite. His name is Clint. Clint eats wood.

jeremyp

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Re: More jokes please, good or bad as long as they're funny.
« Reply #1795 on: February 10, 2024, 01:05:14 PM »
Dartmoor prison walks into a pub.

Sorry, can't think of a good punch line.
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Nearly Sane

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Re: More jokes please, good or bad as long as they're funny.
« Reply #1796 on: February 11, 2024, 12:34:38 PM »
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Aruntraveller

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Re: More jokes please, good or bad as long as they're funny.
« Reply #1797 on: February 11, 2024, 12:36:55 PM »
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Before we work on Artificial Intelligence shouldn't we address the problem of natural stupidity.

Nearly Sane

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Re: More jokes please, good or bad as long as they're funny.
« Reply #1798 on: February 12, 2024, 09:36:27 AM »
Great win for Taylor Swift at the Superbowl in her rookie season.

Nearly Sane

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Re: More jokes please, good or bad as long as they're funny.
« Reply #1799 on: February 12, 2024, 10:00:56 AM »
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