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Author Topic: More jokes please, good or bad as long as they're funny.  (Read 145375 times)

Nearly Sane

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Re: More jokes please, good or bad as long as they're funny.
« Reply #1400 on: April 09, 2023, 06:37:58 PM »
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Nearly Sane

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Re: More jokes please, good or bad as long as they're funny.
« Reply #1401 on: April 14, 2023, 01:59:28 PM »
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Nearly Sane

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Re: More jokes please, good or bad as long as they're funny.
« Reply #1402 on: April 16, 2023, 12:22:36 PM »
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Nearly Sane

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Re: More jokes please, good or bad as long as they're funny.
« Reply #1403 on: April 17, 2023, 10:53:27 AM »
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Outrider

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Re: More jokes please, good or bad as long as they're funny.
« Reply #1404 on: April 18, 2023, 09:13:16 AM »
A Russian wife turned to her husband and asked, "What's this special military operation our glorious leader keeps talking about?" Her husband replied, "It's a war to stop America and NATO." "Oh, right” she says “How's it going?"

“Well” he replied “so far we have lost over 20 generals, 110,000 troops killed, countless injured, 3000 tanks, 300 aircraft, hundreds of helicopters, countless armoured vehicles, artillery and trucks, our flagship along with other naval ships, our army is being defeated in most areas and we have had to resort to conscription to replace our losses”.

“Wow” replied the wife “what about America and NATO”?

“They haven’t turned up yet”
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Nearly Sane

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Re: More jokes please, good or bad as long as they're funny.
« Reply #1405 on: April 18, 2023, 10:30:11 AM »
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Nearly Sane

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Re: More jokes please, good or bad as long as they're funny.
« Reply #1406 on: April 21, 2023, 08:13:43 PM »
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SteveH

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Re: More jokes please, good or bad as long as they're funny.
« Reply #1407 on: April 22, 2023, 02:28:25 PM »
Quote from: Nearly Sane on April 18, 2023, 10:30:11 AM
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Marie Curie - first woman to win a Nobel prize, first person to win two Nobel prizes, and still the only person to win Nobel prizes in two different disciplines. Wotagal!
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When politicians talk about making tough decisions, they mean tough for us, not for them.

Harrowby Hall

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Re: More jokes please, good or bad as long as they're funny.
« Reply #1408 on: April 22, 2023, 05:15:30 PM »
Quote from: SteveH on April 22, 2023, 02:28:25 PM
Marie Curie - first woman to win a Nobel prize, first person to win two Nobel prizes, and still the only person to win Nobel prizes in two different disciplines. Wotagal!

... And the first woman to win a Nobel prize in each of two categories who had a daughter who won a Nobel prize.

There's not a mantelpiece on the planet that can beat that!
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Nearly Sane

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Re: More jokes please, good or bad as long as they're funny.
« Reply #1409 on: April 24, 2023, 02:37:34 PM »
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Nearly Sane

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Re: More jokes please, good or bad as long as they're funny.
« Reply #1410 on: April 24, 2023, 03:49:33 PM »
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Nearly Sane

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Re: More jokes please, good or bad as long as they're funny.
« Reply #1411 on: April 27, 2023, 01:45:46 PM »
How do Brits measure things


https://youtu.be/eZW-FjI2iMI
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Nearly Sane

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Re: More jokes please, good or bad as long as they're funny.
« Reply #1412 on: April 27, 2023, 10:43:21 PM »
I bought a George Formby grill instead of a George Foreman one!
Never mind, my steaks turned out nice again..
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Nearly Sane

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Re: More jokes please, good or bad as long as they're funny.
« Reply #1413 on: May 02, 2023, 10:48:30 AM »
Points to Andy Murray
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jeremyp

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Re: More jokes please, good or bad as long as they're funny.
« Reply #1414 on: May 02, 2023, 11:03:58 AM »
Quote from: Nearly Sane on April 27, 2023, 01:45:46 PM
How do Brits measure things


https://youtu.be/eZW-FjI2iMI

I loved that, especially the subtitle that said "tons and tonnes".
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Nearly Sane

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Re: More jokes please, good or bad as long as they're funny.
« Reply #1415 on: May 03, 2023, 12:39:10 PM »
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Nearly Sane

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Re: More jokes please, good or bad as long as they're funny.
« Reply #1416 on: May 03, 2023, 07:09:29 PM »
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Nearly Sane

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Re: More jokes please, good or bad as long as they're funny.
« Reply #1417 on: May 03, 2023, 10:05:08 PM »
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Nearly Sane

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Re: More jokes please, good or bad as long as they're funny.
« Reply #1418 on: May 04, 2023, 03:21:36 PM »
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Nearly Sane

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Re: More jokes please, good or bad as long as they're funny.
« Reply #1419 on: May 05, 2023, 06:39:45 PM »
And happy birthday Karl Marx
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Nearly Sane

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Re: More jokes please, good or bad as long as they're funny.
« Reply #1420 on: May 09, 2023, 01:08:49 PM »
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SqueakyVoice

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Re: More jokes please, good or bad as long as they're funny.
« Reply #1421 on: May 10, 2023, 04:46:52 PM »
I saw some graffiti, where someone had written  'GANB' and I thought, 'that's bang out of order.'
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Nearly Sane

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Re: More jokes please, good or bad as long as they're funny.
« Reply #1422 on: May 11, 2023, 07:39:53 PM »
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SteveH

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Re: More jokes please, good or bad as long as they're funny.
« Reply #1423 on: May 14, 2023, 07:37:49 AM »
I used to run a dating service for chickens, but I was struggling to make hens meet.
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When politicians talk about making tough decisions, they mean tough for us, not for them.

Walt Zingmatilder

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Re: More jokes please, good or bad as long as they're funny.
« Reply #1424 on: May 14, 2023, 09:40:01 AM »
My neighbour is very sad about the end of his career in pantomime so I said to him " You should put it all                 B E H I N D  Y O U !!!!!!!!!"
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