A para I posted elsewhere
Good luck to my friends standing to be MPs today, all of you, every single one really, even Bill the UKIP,, I mean I obviously don't want you to win Bill the UKIP, after all this is a friendship based on honesty if nothing else! And honestly Bill? The UKIP? But no, all of you, standing for MPs and when I remember you sometimes, well frequently, well most of the time, you couldn't stand or spell MP, or pretty much any thing. But, that's all fine now, you have matured and put childish things behind you, apart from Bunsen Bear as the security staff at City know. You are there to represent us which you will do magnificently I am sure - none of that delegating though, we are not that sort of a democracy! So if you are elected, be proud but not too proud, not like that time you won the pub quiz in The Rock,. Won? Won? Were part of winning team, mostly on my answers, or the wee boy John who ended up in our team accidentally but knew all the British birds plumages reversed in the hand in sheet round and off you went dancing round the whole pub singing 'Simply the Best!' In a mixed but borderline my father's dentists was Jim Craig pub!!! But no, even with that and those other blemishes which we don't mention often, well that often, well not every fricckin second, like the frisbee, the piano and the black black oil, good luck!
