Hi everyone,
This thread is about marrying a 14 year old. Most people today think of a 14 year old as a child. But does this have any biological basis or is it just a recent cultural norm?!
1. The concept of a 'Major' is a fairly recent one. This was required for voting purposes as also for legal purposes of signing documents and cheques, driving and so on. Some age had to be fixed after which a person could be considered an adult and a suitable age was fixed in each country. This has changed significantly over the decades in different countries. Even today it is quite different in different countries and communities, ranging from 16 to 21.
2. Many countries have adopted the same legal Major age for purposes of marriage also. Some countries have adopted a different age for marriage as compared to the legal age of maturity for other purposes.
3. But the fact remains that the Major age (in any country) has no biological basis and is purely arbitrary. It would be absurd to think that a person is mature enough for marriage at 18 years in England but the same person becomes mature at 16 in Scotland and only at 21 in Egypt.
4. The only true and medically ascertainable method of distinguishing between an adult and a child is puberty. It is puberty during which the body and mind of a person changes significantly, at whatever age it may happen in different people.
5. Puberty is when a person becomes capable of sexual activity, marriage and bearing children. Sex with a post pubescent person is not pedophilia as some people have clarified above.
6. The argument about mental and emotional maturity is vague and there is no clear measurable way of ascertaining when a person is mentally and emotionally mature. Many people in their late 20's and 30's or even much later can be emotionally unstable. Many people below 18 or 16 can be very mature emotionally. It depends on the person and their upbringing.
7. People in earlier centuries lived under harsh and demanding conditions because of which they matured much earlier than the present day youngsters do. Therefore a person of 14, if post pubescent, would have been perfectly capable of marrying, bearing children and taking care of herself at that age. People were also much more socially close knit than today and were helped by parents and relatives to manage children. You cannot sit on judgement on such people just because you happen to have a different norm today in your country. I am sure many of your grandparents and great grandparents were well below the marriageable age of today when they married in the early 1900's or late 1800's.
8. Therefore who we consider as a 'Child' is not as clear cut and definitive as some of you seem to think. It differs from country to country and from time to time. As far as emotional maturity is concerned it differs from person to person and no specific age can be fixed.....
9. Another point I wish to make is about sexual activity outside marriage. Leaving the legal aspect aside, if some of you think a girl or boy at say 14 can have sexual relations with several partners, with all its associated problems of diseases, contraception, pregnancy, abortion, rejection, emotional difficulties and so on....why is marriage such a big problem?
Cheers.
Sriram