9 year old suicide

[Sriram]

Hi everyone,

A 9 year old declares himself gay, is bullied and commits suicide!

https://www.bbc.com/news/world-us-canada-45341355

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The mother of a US nine-year-old, who she says killed himself after enduring homophobic bullying, says she "should have seen the pain in his eyes".

Leia Rochelle Pierce from Denver, Colorado, said her son, Jamel Myles, had been proud to tell people he was gay when he returned to school.

She told Victoria Derbyshire some fellow pupils told him to kill himself.

Denver Public Schools said it was committed to ensuring all pupils were treated with dignity and respect.

Ms Pierce said she blamed herself for his death, adding that her "heart was breaking every second".

"I feel responsible because I didn't see the pain in my baby's eyes. I should have just known. It's my fault, I didn't know."

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How can a 9 year old even know that he is gay, let alone declare it to his friends? How the heck did the parents allow him to even think that at his age?

Next it will be a five year old, I guess! 

Sriram

[Roses]

A terrible tragedy! I was bullied throughout my time at elementary school, it was a ghastly experience!

[Nearly Sane]

Based on your previous posts, this is at the age you think would be reasonable to send your child for epigenetic therapy to stop them having a disease of being homosexual, Sriram?

[Nearly Sane]

Moderator Note I corrected the spelling of Suicide in the title and follow up comments.

[Aruntraveller]

I am sure a similar issue arose fairly recently where a child was bullied for being gay, even though they weren't. It seems to me Sririam that you are focussing on the wrong people here. Regardless of whether you think the parents were misguided, would it not be better to concentrate on the real issue here which is bullying, rather than trying to make yet another negative point about homosexuality, which despite the years spent on this board discussing the issue has left you none the wiser.

I can assure you many children have fully realised what sexuality they are by the age of 9 or 10. At least, thats what my heterosexual friends tell me. .

[Sriram]

Based on your previous posts, this is at the age you think would be reasonable to send your child for epigenetic therapy to stop them having a disease of being homosexual, Sriram?

I don't want to get into an argument about homosexuality but since you mentioned epigenetics...yes indeed....epigenetics could be the cause of homosexuality. That is science.

https://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Epigenetic_theories_of_homosexuality

That issue however has nothing to do with the idea of a 9 year old declaring himself gay. 

[Nearly Sane]

I don't want to get into an argument about homosexuality but since you mentioned epigenetics...yes indeed....epigenetics could be the cause of homosexuality. That is science.

https://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Epigenetic_theories_of_homosexuality

That issue however has nothing to do with the idea of a 9 year old declaring himself gay.

It's a thread about homosexuality. Which you think is a treatable disease and you want to avoid discussing what effect that might have on a 9 year old who thinks they are gay...mmm

[Aruntraveller]

So tell me Sririam, if a 9 year old told you they were straight (heterosexual) would you tell them its too early to know what your sexuality is or would you take it at face value?

[wigginhall]

As Trent said, I think 9 or 10 is quite a common age to start fancying people.   Homophobic OP.

[Nearly Sane]

As Trent said, I think 9 or 10 is quite a common age to start fancying people.   Homophobic OP.

The extraordinary thing was the total lack of condemnation of the bullying but a quick bit of blaming everyone else,

[Rhiannon]

The extraordinary thing was the total lack of condemnation of the bullying but a quick bit of blaming everyone else,

Indeed.

[Robbie]

What a terribly sad story!

Agree it is about bullying, not about Jamel child saying he was gay. His sister told mum that was the reason but bullies will pick on anything. So tragic that he ended his life though.

I've never before heard of a nine year old saying they are gay, at that age they do hero worship but that isn't sexual. If Jamel had lived to be thirteen he might well have found out that he was seriously heterosexual! What a waste.

Regarding epigenetics, we have discussed that before but I skim read the Wiki article. It's just a theory amongst many other theories, I wouldn't pay too much attention to it. There will be those who latch on because they have an agenda but not too many, it's far too airy fairy. Sririam posted it as he often posts things for discussion but he hasn't said he espouses it. I sincerely hope not.

[Aruntraveller]

Sririam posted it as he often posts things for discussion but he hasn't said he espouses it. I sincerely hope not.

Oh yes he does.

(I'm in pantomime dame mode)

[Nearly Sane]

Oh yes he does.

(I'm in pantomime dame mode)

He's behind you!

[Shaker]

How can a 9 year old even know that he is gay, let alone declare it to his friends?

How many gay people do you know? If it's a number greater than 0 (which I doubt), why don't you ask them when they were first aware of being gay?

How the heck did the parents allow him to even think that at his age?

Sexual orientation is something that simply exists, and isn't "allowed" by a third party

[Aruntraveller]

To reiterate the obvious:

https://www.lgbtqnation.com/2018/08/yes-9-year-old-can-know-gay/

[wigginhall]

How can someone ask how parents can allow their child to think something?  WTF.   My son, I forbid you thinking or feeling certain things.  That's the way to bring up a child!

[Sriram]

Alright...alright! Just hold on. Homophobic? Where did that come from?! You people seem to be paranoid!!

I was just saying that a nine year old would not have even attained puberty. Even if it is a case of precocious puberty, how the heck would a child know that he is gay. At that age, it is common to mix with friends of the same sex. Many boys around that age even hate girls.

So, instead of explaining such matters to the child and waiting for him to grow up, how can parents take it for granted that the child is gay and allow him to declare it at school?

That was the point...so don't get your hackles up, for God's sake! 

[Shaker]

Alright...alright! Just hold on. Homophobic? Where did that come from?! You people seem to be paranoid!!

I was just saying that a nine year old would not have even attained puberty. Even if it is a case of precocious puberty, how the heck would a child know that he is gay.

How many gay people do you know? If it's a number greater than 0 (which I doubt), why don't you ask them when they were first aware of being gay?

[Rhiannon]

Alright...alright! Just hold on. Homophobic? Where did that come from?! You people seem to be paranoid!!

I was just saying that a nine year old would not have even attained puberty. Even if it is a case of precocious puberty, how the heck would a child know that he is gay. At that age, it is common to mix with friends of the same sex. Many boys around that age even hate girls.

So, instead of explaining such matters to the child and waiting for him to grow up, how can parents take it for granted that the child is gay and allow him to declare it at school?

That was the point...so don't get your hackles up, for God's sake! 

You condemned the parents and not the bullies.

[Aruntraveller]

So, instead of explaining such matters to the child and waiting for him to grow up, how can parents take it for granted that the child is gay and allow him to declare it at school?

Not wishing to point out the obvious but plenty of parents take it for granted that their child is heterosexual, without talking to their child about it (and I definitely know about this from personal experience), so the parents, in this case, appear to have taken the child's feelings into account.

As Rhi says and I said earlier, you are shifting the blame and emphasis from the real issue bullying, to the parents.

It is yet another failure of society and you yourself, not seeing and holding homosexual people and heterosexual people of being intrinsically of equal value.

[Rhiannon]

Not wishing to point out the obvious but plenty of parents take it for granted that their child is heterosexual, without talking to their child about it (and I definitely know about this from personal experience), so the parents, in this case, appear to have taken the child's feelings into account.

As Rhi says and I said earlier, you are shifting the blame and emphasis from the real issue bullying, to the parents.

It is yet another failure of society and you yourself, not seeing and holding homosexual people and heterosexual people of being intrinsically of equal value.

It’s actively saying that not only are homosexual people of less value, they are somehow ‘wrong’.

[Shaker]

It’s actively saying that not only are homosexual people of less value, they are somehow ‘wrong’.

This individual has already made his views on being gay abundantly clear:

Alright...some people may feel that homosexuality is not...repeat not... a  disease and does not need to be cured!  But I tend to disagree.

https://tinyurl.com/ycemw8e5

[Nearly Sane]

This individual has already made his views on being gay abundantly clear:

https://tinyurl.com/ycemw8e5

And that if a therapy were available he would take his child to be 'cured'

http://www.religionethics.co.uk/index.php?topic=10205.150

[Shaker]

... and homosexuality is all about 'lust':

Thousands of mothers and fathers  […] see their sons/daughters struggling as homosexuals […] from a purely evolutionary and survival point of view, every person wants his/her genes to be propagated through their children. Its a natural impulse […] they see their progeny merely bedding people for lust and not for children.