Ask god a question

[ekim]

ekim,

Indeed, for is it not also known that those who imbibe such libations to excess will often find themselves head down in the big white telephone intoning His name over and over again?

Hello, Mercury again.  Well it sounds like Bacchus but I'm not sure that it is.

I forgot to tell Gordon how Bacchus is trying to modify Christian themed music.  If he listens to this he will see the change after 2 minutes in :- https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=ZqN9aS2S3L0

[Gordon]

Hello, Mercury again.  Well it sounds like Bacchus but I'm not sure that it is.

I forgot to tell Gordon how Bacchus is trying to modify Christian themed music.  If he listens to this he will see the change after 2 minutes in :- https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=ZqN9aS2S3L0

I did listen: now if Bacchus could arrange for the phone-muzak to be more like this, which has the same title, it would be infinitely (in the divine sense) more tolerable.

https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=jgPMYQTINNk

[ekim]

or this? ..... https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=VPpd-6X3tEo

[Gordon]

or this? ..... https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=VPpd-6X3tEo

No no no - I don't think Bacchus is my kind of chap at all. What I need is a God who would ensure that its phone-muzak included the likes of Tom Waits, Miles Davis, Elvis Costello or Steely Dan.

[Steve H]

One could argue that you have been indoctrinated as you desire that the UK leaves the EU.

One can disagree with you (and me, for that matter) without being indoctrinated, you know!

[ippy]

One could argue that you have been indoctrinated as you desire that the UK leaves the EU.

Yes right from the start when it was supposed to be the EEC, before it was this indigestible for me ever closer union it now is and yes it is debatable where as  there's no evidence, an absolute zero of evidence available to support any of the magical mystical superstition based elements put forward on this particular thread.

I'm certain your preference for remain is sincere but it is as I said, debatable.

Regards, ippy.

[Gordon]

Moderator:

Could we please discuss Brexit in the thread specific to that, and not here.

[Roses]

God, when I was a child and prayed for your help with a problem which really upset me and caused  me nightmares, why did I never have any sign that you were there, let alone helping me? No wonder I lost my faith!

[SusanDoris]

I think God is redundant now anyway - if I have a question, I can ask Alexa.

[God]

Why thank you Mercury: could you please ask the Christian God, since I seem to be in the catchment area for that one, why I've been kept on hold these last 67 years without out even an acknowledgement that I am there (and, by the way, the Christian-themed background muzak is shite).

Thanking you, in anticipation.

I'm the God of everybody, not just Christians. It's a bit like being an MP. Yes, it's true, I was elected. We have a system of One God, One Vote. I am the one God and I have the one vote.

[God]

I think God is redundant now anyway - if I have a question, I can ask Alexa.

Actually, that's quite a lucrative subcontract for me.

[Walter]

Actually, that's quite a lucrative subcontract for me.

Dear God
In the past I have been a very bad person but I want to change and be a good person .
Please give me tonight's Euromillions numbers so I can help lots of unfotunate people (I promise)
Thank you God 👍

[Walter]

Currently I help more people than you anyway 😡

[God]

Dear God
In the past I have been a very bad person but I want to change and be a good person .
Please give me tonight's Euromillions numbers so I can help lots of unfotunate people (I promise)
Thank you God 👍

If I told everybody who asked me for tonight's Euromillions number what they are going to be, you'd all get £12.57 each. Doesn't seem worth it really, does it.

[Walter]

If I told everybody who asked me for tonight's Euromillions number what they are going to be, you'd all get £12.57 each. Doesn't seem worth it really, does it.

but I don't care about the others and neither should you , you know, just like normal .

[God]

but I don't care about the others and neither should you , you know, just like normal .

Funnily enough, all the others are saying something similar. Either I give all of you the lottery numbers or I pick one person at random and that person is unlikely to be you.

OK you have persuaded me, I'll do the latter...

... right that's done it. Some lucky person is going to get very rich.

[Gordon]

Dear God

How will Brexit turn out?

[Nearly Sane]

Dear God

How will Brexit turn out?

Isn't that the type of question Captain Kirk used to ask megalomaniac computers who would then self destruct?

[Gordon]

Isn't that the type of question Captain Kirk used to ask megalomaniac computers who would then self destruct?

Indeed - and with associated steam and clanking.

Perhaps God would prefer an easier question, such as 'how long is a piece of string'.

[Nearly Sane]

Indeed - and with associated steam and clanking.

Perhaps God would prefer an easier question, such as 'how long is a piece of string'.

What Is the Airspeed Velocity of an Unladen Swallow?

[jeremyp]

What Is the Airspeed Velocity of an Unladen Swallow?

I think you might need to be a bit more specific.

[Nearly Sane]

I think you might need to be a bit more specific.

There are 3 swallows in one.

[jeremyp]

There are 3 swallows in one.

I was thing more African or European.

[Robbie]

I very rarely ask questions of God but now that God is a member of this forum, I'd like to ask what he thinks of this book series (which I haven't read):
https://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Conversations_with_God

[Nearly Sane]

 

I was thing more African or European.

God knew that but answers in mysterious ways