Perhaps a lot of that can be described as foreplay? Touch, along with sight, sound, smell, are all good things.
If you're trying to isolate the two into distinct categories in order to get some sort of purely mechanistic part that's 'sex' then you're looking for the term 'coitus' - 'sex' is the range of activities which includes that, but isn't limited to it.
I'm not saying they should, however, I think they do better if they do restrict it to that, because otherwise it becomes more about lust than about love.
You're not saying they should restrict themselves, but they should restrict themselves? It doesn't become more about lust than love necessarily, but for some (most?) people part of love is lust - certainly I can honestly say that my marriage would be harder to keep going if Mrs. O. weren't still attractive to me, and she gives me the same impression.
It follows because it gives a clue as to what is the best form for it to take.
Best for what? You're coming back to trying to make sex about procreation again, it seems. Best for whom? In what way is it the best way of having sex for people who don't like that kind of sex? One size does not fit all.
The issue was not about what is penetrating what, but about behaving in accordance with one's sex (gender).
Which one, because they are different - and they are not the same thing as someone's sexuality. The thing is, being a lesbian and having sex with women is absolutely in keeping with both someone's sex and their gender; a lesbian having sex with a man is in keeping with her sex (which she isn't changing) and her gender (which she isn't changing) but it's not in line with her sexuality.
Which shelf a book in a library is kept on will depend on its category, in order to enable customers to find what they are looking for.
Yes, but we categorise books by their content, not by the colour of the cover. Saying 'that person has this format of genitalia, therefore they must have sex this way and this way only' fails to appreciate that within blue covers, books range from cookery to erotica to shoes to Gandalf.
Keeping it on a different category shelf defeats the object of having a library. So if two men or two women kiss in public or on TV, they are creating disorder.
No. You are responsible for your response to someone else's actions. If it disorders you, that's about your perception of it - that may or may not be justified, but it's not intrinsically about them. A woman kissing the person they love in public is not a source of disorder - you can tell, because when the person they love is a man there's no issue. When a woman is kissed by someone she loves in public it's not a source of disorder - you can tell, because when the person they love is a man there's no issue. The act is the same, the target is the same, the perception - in some instances - overlays a difference.
People watching expect men to kiss women.
You watching expect men to kiss women. I expect people to kiss people, under the right circumstances; the only time I have cause to object is if they're trying to kiss me, Mrs. O, or someone I don't think is into it.
The problem is that even if the setting is private, the effects spill out into society.
Of the sex, or of the relationship? If the sex is in private, none of it spills out; you don't know if they're a celibate gay couple or a sexually-active gay couple. You might presume, but again that's on you. If the relationship is the issue, why are we talking about the physical acts?
And then... what is the 'effect' that spills out into society of gay people visibly having relationships? What's the downside? Where's the harm?
The goal of society is to work towards and maintain order, so it helps if men and women act like what they are.
Wow! How do you pack so much authoritarian wrong into one short sentence? The goal of society is whatever the people within the society collectively decide it is; that varies by culture, and time, and subculture. If the goal is 'maintain order' (which I strongly question) then how is forcing men and women to act against their nature conducive to that? Surely allowing - even encouraging - gay people into stable, loving, respected relationships where they can add to society and be a productive, active, welcome member of society is conducive to maintaining order?
Most of this I have answered. I am arguing without referring to God or the Bible. I don't think anyone should be ostracized, but people have to be able to say if they think something is wrong.
Which, in principle, I'd agree with - I just can't see where you get the idea that any of this is 'wrong' from.
And of course everyone has to remember the plank in their own eye before telling their brother about the speck in his eye.
Homophobia in other people's eyes, though, is more thank a speck, and has been harming more than just my brother for a long, long time; I'd come back with 'evil only requires good men to stand by and say nothing.'
O.