The problem seems to be that they use terrorist tactics to achieve that. If they allowed the Russian-speaking Donbass to become autonomous and agreed on non-NATO status, the rest of Ukraine could westernize as it chose to.
I thought the Russians would like us all to believe that the Ukrainians completely destroyed their own city of Mariupol as a false flag operation, so that they could blame the Russians for doing so. Are the Russians saying that they might just have done a teeny-weeny bit of shelling? I think I rather lost patience with anything the Russian propaganda machine puts out, after I heard Sergei Lavrov describing the Ukrainian claims of the destruction of their city as "pathetic".
'Pathetic' is hardly the word to describe such a tragedy, however it came about, but I can't think of any nation in history which has perpetrated such destruction on itself as the Russians are claiming the Ukrainians are doing to themselves. There ought to be some room for laughter at the brainless, unimaginative protestations from the Russian propaganda machine, except that the mindless barbarism of these Untermenschen precludes it.